Forgiveness

"I wish my Dad's so-called wives in the past would have left for feeling unappreciated. Haha, then again, that was a different situation altogether. Mooching and no love between them, endless whining day in and day out... I know it's against God, but I doubt I'll be able to forgive her anytime soon. I think we all learned and got stronger from it though, learned how to deal with people like that."

This is a comment to my blog titled response to controlled chaos. First of all it is from a great friend of mine who I can also be glad to call family even if merely by marriage. Tommy Tommy Tommy, it breaks my heart to read it though, mainly the point I took the liberty of making bold and red so it sticks out like a sore thumb. No one is perfect, (Psalm 53:3) however that is never an excuse to knowingly or willingly go against God (i.e.sin). I do completely understand your feelings for B. for I know alot that she put you and your siblings through. I do admit that I do not know all of what you went through with her, and I do sympathize with you for the grief, heartache, and pain that you endured from her self-centeredness.

I had a step-mom growing up that I hated with a passion, I will not lie about those feelings. She did things that no kid should ever go through, I will not get specific, it will serve no purpose, and don't feel bad for me, its just another period in my life I had to go through to become the man I am now. There are still moments in my life I find myself reflecting back on those times with resentment and bitterness still towards her and my dad of which I get mad at myself every time I do that. For really what are those feelings going to accomplish? If I feed those feelings they will just grow into evil passions and desires. Right? Whatever a person feeds, physically or mentally, that will grow. If a person feeds evil passions and desires, should he then expect to reap of harvest of blessings and good tidings? Absolutely not, he will reap a plentiful crop of more evil passions and desires. Look at porn, look at money, look at drugs, they reap nothing good but only a lust for more and more. Galatians 6:7 "Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap."

Now I'm not trying to preach Tommy's head off (maybe a little) but simply trying to make a point scripturally. I love the fact that Tommy's statement said that he could not forgive her anytime soon, which is great, for than there is at least that chance that he will someday find forgiveness in his heart through Christs grace to forgive her. Jesus gives us a straight forward teaching on forgiveness in His sermon on the mount found in Matthew 6:14-15 "For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.(15)But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses" Doesn't leave any room for "interpretation" as some might suggest, its pretty much to the point.

The biggest benefit to forgiving others who sin against you is for you and not them. So many times we think that forgiving someone who wronged us is letting that person get away with it and it not being fair. Let us approach as the Bible tells us, and forgive them for our consciences sake. We sin so much in our consciences and many of us don't know or realize it. Not forgiving someone is so much more a burden to you then them. You have been the one wronged and hanging on to that leaves bitterness, hate, malice, etc.... inside you which will grow as we discussed earlier if you feed it. So in not forgiving a person who has wronged you can do so much damage to you and your relationship with God.

I mentioned earlier that I still occasionally deal with those feelings for my step mother of long ago, as well as several other people from my past. Don't let the enemy get that stronghold on you. It's hard to forgive, extremely hard at times when the offenses seem to "unforgivable." I will admit it is not easy, and on our own we can not do it, yes you read right, on our own we can not truly forgive someone who has sinned against us. We have to give that over to God, for without Gods hand in it, we will and cannot truly forgive. He is the author of all, definitely forgiveness.

I would like to end this by writing a verse that shows Gods love and forgiveness unto us Romans 5:6-8 "For when we were still without strength, in due time Christ died for the ungodly.(7)For scarcely for a righteous man will one die; yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die.(8)But God demonstrates His own love towards us, in that while we were still sinners Christ died for us"

My prayer for all who read this is that you may continue to grow in your walk with God down the narrow path which leads to eternal life. Forgive much so that you may be forgiven much, no matter how hard or impossible it may seem at times, remember that the Lord is right there and willing to help his children. For as the verse we just read tells us that Christ came when we were at or ugliest in sin and died for us to grant us forgiveness, how much should we be willing to follow such an awesome example in our own lives. Forgive much, Love much, and draw closer to God every day. Good tidings and love to all.
C.